Out of Life - Growing, Naturally ...

A friend of mine some time ago told me a personal story which I find more than completely worth to share. It was about a journey her mother made at quite a high age.

My friend's mother, my friend and some other friend went visiting the place they had lived in Morocco before they had to leave due to political reasons. It was the mother's deep wish to once again see that place she had lived and grew up.

The mother was very quiet throughout the journey, and soaked up all the impressions. The house they had lived in had been located at the end of a little street leading upwards, and the little company went there to find it.

At a point, the mother became even more quiet, just resting completely in herself.

A little smile played over her face as she voiced:

'Oh, how petty these stairs are, in fact.

When I was a child, and I remember this well, I always had to take very high levels of effort to get up to the house and the stairs used to look so high!'


Thank you & bises, A.! 
Thanks too to your mom, for sharing this more than precious finding.
We are growing, naturally, anyway. Sometimes, we still have to find that out somehow. Enjoy a nice holy day, every one, yours, Lyn

Inspect 'Respect'

Ever inspected what we easily believe just because at a point in our lives it was hammered into our heads?

It is fun to analyse the true meaning behind what is commonly understood in a certain way and has been glued to a certain common 'meaning'. At the same time, the words, if you examine them well, tell something totally different than how they are commonly used. So it is with 'respect'.

Deriving from Latin, it simply means

"act of looking back at one," 
pp. of respicere "look back at, regard, consider," 
from re- "back" + specere "look at"

[Online Etymology Dictionary, as I find a real good one, © 2001-2012 Douglas Harper].

Haven't so many of us, at least the somewhat elder generation, received those implants that 'to respect' means something like slavishly obey, to do anything that person says because he or she is 'higher' in the hierarchy, to honour that person just for being the elder, the first, the one who keeps the overview - but in the end, it was just to control, to have the power in his or her hands and such, refuse the other members of that group to decide somewhat freely and live their lives and grow up? The latter is not always obvious or visible and is difficult to find out behind an outward attitude of helpfulness, interest or concern (the passive-aggressive part I was writing about somewhat earlier).

pic of little Kennedy found on triviazoids

Haven't many of us at least a few times in life experienced that someone expected or, even better, demanded respect though if you look back at what that person had done in life and how that person behaves there is no good reason to honour what she or he had produced there?

I mean, we all make our stupid mistakes in lives, that's simply normal and part of it, and it does not mean that we judge others because of that. Some real good re-inspection just makes us see clearer about the world we live in and what we ourselves want to follow, achieve or produce ourselves, without beeing steered by what others have chosen for themselves to live with, as ours. Each one got his or her own life. It is up to everyone what he or she makes out of it and what he goes for.


In this sense, the 'command' (I'd better call it a real good advise) to 'Respect Your Parents' or 'Respect Family', again, is very good reason to 'look at what's behind'. Maybe we should understand that advise in the sense to examine and re-inspect and what the persons under whose influence we grew up or still are or with whom we are connected, in reality have created, brought forth or have accomplished in their lives, and what re-sults this had in the chains of causalities for whom.

You may call it psychological hygiene, in the end it is good to re-view and re-assess our own believes and perceptions regularly or at least from time to time - or if never done before, at a point in life, even if it is already quite late, to at least at a late stage catch up with what we had missed to do earlier.

It will open our eyes and hopefully at a later point, our senses, if we start to do so. And, as there is always the option to forgive, this may allow us to see things much more relaxed than if we remain with the dogmata we have been conditioned to believe and are steered by such until the end of our days.

This is what I would then call real respect and how I have always considered the term 'respect'. Well, for me who has always questioned everything this is not diffcult but I know, for many it is.

The information is lying just on the street in front of your feet.

And if you like so, you can ask yourself:
What is it you have learned to 'respect', and then have later never  questioned? 

It is just a nice little exercise for own re-adjustment. It is good to look at how things are and provides a more free view. And in principle it is so easy to understand. We inspect any object when it is not functioning where the problem is, or when a pipe is leaking we try to find out where the leakage is, but just with our own lives we refuse because of whatever strange reasons. It is so obvious we need to re-inspect also our internal and external re-lations to find out what we look back at and what is such the fundament we build on.


With kind re-gards
(a playful way to 'get' the meanings of the words we use everyday and usually don't re-flect ;)),

Lyn

Why write?

Why writing at all?

Well, one reason is simply to share. Share experiences, share insights, make information available, too. The world is as connected as never before, but individuals are also as separated as also never before which is not visible at first sight (though sociologists write a lot about the recent tendencies of forming separated groups and so on. We experience a class, national and social parallel and micro systems backlash at its best).

As a wanderer between the worlds in all regards, I was in a lucky position to quite early realize how small, how limited views can be if people stay within limited boundaries of thinking. While the world is so wide open today, as wide open as it has never been at any point or moment in time before, people limitize themselves, The more they are limited, the less they can deal with the growth of information and options around.

Wandering, I found and find many information that made me open my view, each time and ongoingly, deeper and wider. Who never wanders maybe never wonders.

It is such a pity. With hindsight I realize that the changes I underwent already at early stages and especially around very important, sensitive phases in development, had never let me trail off my kind of childish curiosity about what's next, what's behind, a drive to find out how all that is functioning and why.

I had kept my senses with me all the time but most often could not name what I sensed and saw. I just noted that what people say and what they do is so far away one from the other, and that what has happened and what was reported are indeed two pairs of shoes. The discrepance even goes that far that people claim violence to be love and caretaking. And be careful: violence has many forms and is not only what we point out as violence every day and what is reported in the news at a point where it escalates.

The amount of violence in our so-called civilized societies is still the same as in any country that acts it out. We don't have to point with fingers at any other country - we do it happily ourselves. Here, I realized, it is just happening in other ways, hidden, psychologically or in other ways swept under the carpet so that no one may see (see also, if you like so, 'Thou Shalt Not Be Aware', a gorgeous hint by the psychologist Alice Miller).

Also with  hindsight I found that maybe people simply don't know it any better: they might also just have learned it that way and were themselves told that is what love is. A child's brain can not find out what love is if it has not learned any other. The discrepance between what is said, what appeals to the conscious brain, to what it feels, so what is received by the senses, breaks the child already. To be split is what they have learned and never dared to scrutinize or analyze.

They literally stick to what made and makes them sick.
And drag it on into next generations.
Into their next environments.
Their next relations.

A funny phenomenon: The sicker the re-lation, the more the sickness is denied. As a fact: when you talk to people who already are able to speak about their early youth or about traumatic experience, you already deal with people much further in the process than those who constantly confirm that everything was fine.

Working myself through my own past and questions arising naturally at consciousness forming and transforming stages when you develop identity, that from a very early stage we as humans also get limited by being pressed into schemes, IDs and personalities and on pathes that never were ours and that we are not and were never born to be.

Children are like sponges with highest capacities of adapting to any kind of environment. Thrown into a certain surrounding, they quickly learn to function - exactly there and with the conditions in that environment and following the role models they meet. They want to please their environment, naturally.
More profanely expressed, they simply have no other environment than the one they have, and they try to survive in the world they are born into. They must accept and literally swallow what they are fed with, they have not a choice unless they, again literally, want to starve. Once manifested, it gets difficult to get rid of those programmed dogmata and patterns, unless you keep an open mind all the time - and keep on asking and do not consider the things just as given that way.

We all are made with full capabilities, with neurobiological abundance in fact, and then get seriously reduced. We become in a sense crippled from being born as fully able beings into severely disabled ones. This disability seems to be enough and to function, in the environment we were born into and as long as that one is not changing. But it reduces also the capability to expand and grow, seriously. To grow inside ourselves.

I doubt that that was the plan. 
So what to do? Rebel?

At first, the step to realize is to get to know what we don't like or want.

This is a stage that is ultimatively necessary. Having been so tied down, so reduced, we first have to realize what is that what we certainly do not want. The point is that this is a necessary first stage, and only step 1.

We shouldn't stay in this phase forever but it is good to do that thoroughly and with all that we are: emotionally, intellectually, spiritually if you want so, and physically.

Step 2 is to find what it could be we want. This one is much more difficult because so few examples exist how the world could be. The way out is - dreaming. Phantasy. Detect that we have spirit - and that we have soul and that that soul, our self, has quite an idea about how life could be.

The aboriginals are telling their (hi)story that the land was made by their ancestors by dreaming it. It has shown that whatever mankind can dream, also can realize. In the good - and the bad. Our thoughts create, indeed. It is visions we have we can realize - if we want so.

Aboriginal bark painting. Pixel by pixel, as children see the world -
before we learn to reduce to known patterns to the max.

So we have to examine and explore our own thoughts and feelings, don't we?

Feelings are so important because they are the thoughts of the physical level.
If we ignore them, we may build nice castles in the air. Just never anything real.
The emotional body, so other teachings say, is the connective tissue with the spiritual levels. With what kind of spirit will anyone connect who has no access to his/her very own feelings and does not know what is his (or hers) and other people's stuff?

So we also need to puzzle our feelings apart. Find out what were and are ours, our very own feelings, and what not. Puzzle it together again, and be able to always and each moment examine if it was not so that a piece of the puzzle might still be placed errouneously.

Nowadays and in our Western societies, children who dream and speak out their dreams (or what they see) at first get ridiculized, at a later stage and if they persist, get diagnosed and stigmatized. All the others are already well functioning 'helpers' - themselves wanting to 'belong' and 'make it', they support the pressure on those who remain with what they see and for some time refuse to get reduced to see what all the others have agreed on to see.
In important brain re-organisation phases like the ages from 5 to 7 and 12 to 15 years which function naturally as initiations and for wiring ourselves anew and our bodies with our brains, phases in which our identities are created and transformed, are pressed into scholar and other systems where children have to function and deliver expected results. That's one part.
The other part is expectations, wishes, fears and functions by the personal environment and 'family' which are never spoken out (and maybe even not consciously realized). Those are in fact very strong. Extremely strong, as that is what the child identifies first and strongest with just due to the need to survive.
We need to become aware and simply accept the fact that such happens because if we don't, we will always function by invisible commands we have no access to or control over as we don't dare to look at them. So deep is that fear in a child that it persists in the adults, most often until the end of their days.

Wonder why so many people such can not develop their real, inborn and own identities? Those who deliver what is expected (by others) will 'make it' in our systems and get rewarded for neclecting the necessity of maturing, rewiring and growing his or her real self. By outward reward, the Ego is nurtured, blown up overdimensionally and such it pushes aside the real self, so that the self has no chance find itself in itself, not to talk about maturing, growing or evolving. Our systems do not promote 'the best' - our systems promote those the most who have gaps in their personalities due to missing personal evolution in time and who are easily usable as objects and instruments to serve the 'system' going on.

But it all starts much earlier and with the dogmata we get stuffed with about family and in and from our families.


The first thing kids are made to lose are their senses. 

Children principally are equipped with high-resolution instruments to check out all what's around. Step by step, they lose those senses when they 'settle' in this world. At the same time, they are equipped with a wholly functioning brain. Well, mostly, already the quality of the  preconditions steer a lot from even before fetal development on. This includes feelings and the 'fluids' of the environment and the parents, and even the circumstances they are made by and under - feelings cause the chemical cocktail that flushes through an organism in the form of transmitters and hormons, and which co-influences any fetal brain development. Already the chemical cocktail but also the other received information in the mother's womb pre-sets how the neuronal and other developments take place. Get deeper, you must deal with the reality that we are settled inside and outside with millions if not billions of bacteria who have recently been found out to additionally effect mental and psychological states.

Tibetian monks creating a sand mandala.
What later looks as one picture is in fact an arrangement of
many, many grains of sand, different in colour and layer

I should maybe mention that from the point of view of an existing mental world, also all thoughts and emotions which do not directly influence biology or chemistry play a role ... as 'information' which is 'readable' by sensitive beings but not measurable with any technological diagnostics. So it will not be recognized even if it exists. Also the faintest electrical currents, as running through neuronal systems, have certainly effects. But it is up to anyone oneself to take such into account. Already to consider the lots of other, proven factors as a complex is far beyond the complexity people are usually used to deal with.

Next co-factor is a suppression of healthy development, may it be that there is simply lack of what is needed, emotionally, nutrition-related in all regards. Nutrition (or lack of such) influences the chemical cocktail (and therwith neuronal development) as well as does emotion and itat the same time, it influences emotion. In principle, human children are highly emotional. Quickly they learn to suppress those emotions but also to use the expression of certain emotions for getting what they want. Unexpected influence from the environment may happen which cause irritations, up to what is for children traumatic. We sometimes can't help that shit just happens. Unfortunately, there is no good culture in dealing with those traumata. Our parents have not learned such and can't help us with good advice, too. And additionally, societies have invented their very own styles of crippling their own children, culturally sanctified and supported, by in fact causing traumata which are then 'sold' as initiations into a group and even if only by religious tradition which people often consider as 'harmless'.

A trauma means a hurt, a break which causes a leakage, a wound to the soul, anything that endangers the child from it's perspective and that it can not deal with - and no one helps.
Outside, you may not see anything but the soul has to learn to suppress these wounds if the individual wants to belong. We all, as children, are depending on belonging to. Even as adults we often face situations where we need our society, our 'clan'.
So which choice do we have? The scars seem to heal, we forget. But inside, the wound remains, most often uncleaned, and each scar is a location on our skin which is much thicker than the original, sensitive one.

Do children have a choice to remain whole at all if they at the same time depend on the environment they are born into?

Broken people that have learned to function and perform and to deliver to their group or to their 'caretakers' are considered more useful to the functioning of the group - or the 'caretaker'. 

Broken people create new broken people. 
They cycle goes on and on. 

Until one link in the chain starts - to rebel. 
Simply starts to say: no. 
Not with me. 
Not that way.


So why write about this? No one wants to hear or read that. It does all function well, doesn't it?

People must be blind to imagine that what we have built up here does function. Actually, nothing functions at all, and we as species are steering into a perfectly home-made dilemma. Literally home-made. And it's the 'homes' we may start with to clean up.

But what is indeed the loss of a few illusions? If we compare it to the gain of  retrieving and re-integrating at least some pieces of our self - the ones we are inside and were meant to be?

Why the hel am I putting myself into that role of hinting at issues that are not as they look to the outside and getting stigmatized, bullied and scapegoated for that?

Why going on exploring more and deeper and broader why all those things are happening?
Why bothering about other people at all - I could use my energy much better caring for my personal material forthcoming and just have an easy life with lots of amenities if I just would be more 'diplomatic', more 'clever', more 'smart' or more 'streetwise'?

Just out of curiosity, I recently looked up what's going on today with one of the trainers with whose teachings I was in touch at again quite another early stage in my life, my early twenties.
In some sense I am blessed to have received so much diverse input and have been lucky to be at a certain place at a certain time. Maybe it was my hunger for information and insight that guided me. As others are guided by their hunger for other things. What we 'are hungry for' that guides us. This is how our animals in us work for us. Be friends.

One of the most relevant lessons I took with me from this motivation, success and management trainer (well, that was the 90s), was about 'how do you expect a machine to work if you fuel it with low quality gasoline and oil', and the other one was  a metapher about a monkey who will always climb up that palm tree where his 'treasure' is, that what is most important to him.

That trainer was himself in turn early with this kind of trainings, and again, right in time. Isn't it funny that I found that he also gave up the motivation trainings at a point? He realized that people move strongly forward when highly motivated, but 95% of them lose this drive and fall back to their old normality at the moment they are not motivated anymore from 'outside'.
If of 100% of the people who started dealing with such issues as finding a personally successful life, 95% don't pursue their goal just after they lose the input from an outer source, what could this mean?

In a wider sense, it's about energy/power/fuel and about activating the own sources in oneself - or not. When we decide for change and create or move into a motivating environment, we will move on and keep on. If we remain in environments that want to have us exactly where we are - it gets difficult. Real self-motivation seems to be rare. Either we detect our inner drives, and that will drive us further, or we just fall back to what always was.

In another sense the conclusion could be that they need to cover their energy needs from others. They use resources, and consume without replacing or growing anything. And so it looks in the material, our outside world, our planet, as well as on the psychological, the mental and emotional level.


But now, who would allow to take away their energies for the purpose to be consumed by others?

I think there are two main groups who will - or will have to.

1. There are those who freely give because they believe in an ideal of a generous flow which functions like sharing by giving and taking as much as someone momentarily needs so that in the end, every member of the 'organism' or community will have exactly what is needed and right in time it is needed
2. There are those who are under control and/or in dependency relations and have no chance to say 'no' even if they get severely needy themselves and cannot fill themselves who then in turn need to fill up themselves from other sources - mainly again from others whom they move and push into a dependency relation or get under control.

Why do I bother so much about this?

Well, in principle it's easy. I have got eyes to see. I refused to blur my senses. And I get involved into those games over and over myself as long as people can not lay them down.

While I see those mechanisms working in private relations, and am often enough naive enough to find myself cought in such struggle without having wished or wanted to be there. You only know when you are in. From the outside and with the masquerades people have gotten so used to, it is difficult to know beforehand - and also would you give a reasonable chance without prejudging someone. Even when the signs become more visible and accumulate, those who are used to play another role to the outside than what they have inside will go on denying that what you see is real. That is why the development of and living the real self is so much of importance to me: If it would only be the individual's problem and he/she wouldn't bother anyone, it would be fine. As it is inevitable that humans interact, also the underdevelopment of real selves remains a problem for everyone, not only for the ones directly affected. Such naturally affects also any clown.

Beautiful completed sand mandala, the work of many hands and consisting of many many grains.
Yet, so easily gone with the wind. Picture by hagsweet found on flickr.com

As earlier once mentioned, I realize that already the ways men and women meet and live together, sorry to pull this rotten tooth, has most often enough nothing to do with 'love' (though one would assume as 'love' and 'life' are already as words so close together) but are nothing than an ongoing war. An open war sometimes, but most likely, as we call ourselves 'civilized', a cold war.

This is the precondition most of all children these days are born into and grow up in. If parents are aware, they will realize at the very moment a child is born that this is the moment to change. Change life completely, as in the eyes of the new child which have not seen our mistakes we made before, we have the chance to make everything, really really everything, anew.
Most parents don't. Most parents rigidly fall back to exactly what they experienced when having been born and having been children themselves. Additionally, males and females get into severe struggles about roles, powers, positions and such.

Subliminally but effective, what is the biggest chance is the most heavy drawback, too.
It could be overcome by - love.  Real love, not attachment, dependency relations and such.

But as described some posts before, most likely the male and female already didn't come together because of love ... so how now create something the preconditions have not existed at all for, create out of the blue for what no fundament was ever layed?

The open war is, though not funny at all, maybe even easier to deal with, especially for children, as what happens is openly visible. The cold war is tricky and mean and the open, perceiving sponge-like minds of children are told that things are not the way they in fact see them. Such 'lies' are deeply disturbing and often cause the souls to flee.

Such, the cold war in a sense causes a more effective damage than the open war. In an open war you can fight or if not, hopefully flee at a point (which is difficult enough also in Western societies, and the support to do so gets massively reduced step by step. See what I mean with backlash?).

A cold war will only end when one of the contrahents breaks up, literally, psychologically, psychosomatically, or if he/she breaks out into an open war (which is often unlikely - the weapons had been chosen long time ago). Who wants to live and bear something like permanent shielding and sleeping with weapons under the pillow in private life? In fact, people do continuously. The get so used to that shooting at the other and getting wounded oneself is normal in relation that this becomes the only state they know.

Most funny of all, they call this cold war due to relational dependencies and subliminal fights for resources and control: 'merry-age' - marriage. 

Slowly get it why children can't sort the world around them when they are told things the other ways around than what is - and what is sensible and even visible?

Even relations that don't go for the traditional 'merry-age' can't help from mainly functioning for very simple, often material reasons (the ego, financial reasons, tax systems' incentives and socio-cultural environments push them into): building up something, making it in society, owning something ('you are what you have and can show off'), getting into a good position professionally and crowning all that with the standard traditional 'visible evidence' that they also mate - children, as a proof of fertility and that everything is fine with them and they are fully functioning. Apart from those who simply do it as they do on the discovery channel and obey at the same time Vaticanian rules.

[Here I must insert an information puzzle piece I recently found in a documentary about a Japanese young man who is sent by his father to Tokio to become a Sumo wrestler ("and don't dare to come back home without successful results" - actually, the boy after that also didn't go home anymore but decided to live with a friend). The 'students' get lessons about decreasing fertility rates (1.3 kpc - kids per couple) and the advice to soon marry and make children, to make flourish the society. Well, reminded me of some faschistic stuff that was heard in these areas here around seventy years ago, or so. Wherever you look deeper it gets more shocking, these days. No wonder everyone prefers to close their eyes.]

But back to children here: These then in turn, and by birth already pre-defined to function as instruments to keep illusions working, take over the role of glue (and oven enough also fill in where they see other needs and gaps in their parents) to not allow any of the involved members of that game to wake up, unless those want to break all 'civilizational' rules.

Few do - and get stalked, hunted down, at least socially stigmatized. The system works to sustain the system. If you are not lucky to be born into an open-minded family that supports the development of free will and free individualization by offering supportive leadership, it gets hard to do any other than the environment expects you to.

People use other people in their environment, and apart from their 'partners' also their own offspring, as objects and as instruments - and consider and label it 'love'.
In turn, children learn such patterns as 'functional programmes' and apply them, too.
No wonder that relational matters such ways completely confuse.

It all starts in the closest relation - the parental family, and continues into the next ... and the next .... and the next ...... .

Most likely, the actors don't realize, they are already actors in the show and learned their 'scripts' well. They have since birth (and even before with their 'planning') been part of it.

The defects underneath no one sees or even wants to see. The involved can't/don't see it themselves. Because then they would have to face the consequences of what they see, and that could mean to turn around and change. Change something in their system, or change themselves. It is so convenient ... who wants to lose amenities and face majority's cemented beliefs just to readjust one's own little life? They better sacrifice the (probably) only life they are given and submit it to the environment and constraints created by others and which, out of the sudden, they are part of. Members of a system sustain the system.

And there are so many dogmata which support this belief that I even couldn't count them. Interest groups including religious groups - have clearly no interest in humans to out of the sudden 'understand' that 'something is rotten in the state'(s). (Please understand the term 'state/states' as multilateral as it is.)

I am not the first and not the last to point this out, and there is plenty of good literature existing to get an input or a kick-off for the process of understanding what's going on - and the rest you got to, as usual, track and process yourself. It should interest everyone. It is every one's lives that diverge so much from what they could be to what they in fact are.

Wonder why my view of the world and the people within sometimes sounds 'negative'?
The answer is easy and simple mathematics: it's only the difference between what is idolized and what in reality is ... and that is a negative sum. It will be neutral as soon as people act as what they in reality are, or even positive if they come up with positive surprises.

Have given up dreaming? There's still the option to start dreaming now, and don't steal or break down other people's dreams.

It is so evident in these our societies, and still, people get very agitated when somewhere and somewhen, one or several members of the system break down completely and act out the symptoms clearly, while the whole time it is that false and hypocritic systems and dogmata which cause the members - all people - to break. It is not the individuals that at a point break down who are psychotic - it is the environment, the social/environmental/cultural systems by the sanction of tradition, conservatism and disinterest which is psychotic as a whole.

Of course, there is also a certain amount of people who are psychotic due to other, sometimes endogenic, reasons ... but seen as a whole, it is mainly as described. I once read a funny statement by a psychologist - or was it a sociopsychologist? Forgot. He stated that societies are able to tolerate a certain amount of psychotics and there must be a darwinistic reason why nature brings forth psychotics, too. I am totally contrary to that statement. No society can in principle carry psychotics: As the psychotics flourish, and they do that well and always on the cost of others as they lack own creation energy, real inner values and social skills, they will have broken and torn down at least 5-10 others directly for the sake of their psychoses, and the domino and multiplication effect might even be much, much worse. Not to talk about the generational effect. As those psychos are real reptilish and most often intelligent enough predators, it is rare that anyone faces them (they know to whom to show which face, of course, and how to bundle energies and bind in others into their plans when their asses are endangered - as said, they are intelligent enough) and gets them down to earth.

The few humans who see and try to resist it are being made sick by what they perceive and suffer from the symptoms - but even if they are messengers, they are not the cause. In a world that is so inconsistent and where right is declared to be wrong and the other way around, it is clear that any healthy perception must suffer or even give up at a point.

It is a contradiction in itself and most difficult and complex undertaking to at the same time see and resist. 
For the first, walls must be down - and for the latter, they should be erect to protect.
Can you imagine how difficult that gets?

Traumata of our own childhood can not be undone. But we can avoid doing what did hurt us, to others. For that, we need to become aware of our own hurts, wounds and scars, of our vulnerability. Without  ignorance, arrogance and other defense mechanisms so many have learned and built up just to deal with what for themselves was in principle unbearable.


So, why write?

(Next try)

1. First, I have not abolished my senses and take care well that I won't. I see. I sense. I hear. Better and better, actually. Once started, the process goes it's way. No one can take that away and I wished that would also not be taken away from the children as it is done today.
   The mechanisms to blur reality behind nice masks and veils don't function for ever, and the more people try to apply those techniques and mechanisms the more open and finer the senses to detect those manipulistic behaviours will develop in others. I can only encourage people to start as well to look behind the curtains and under the carpets - as there is what you are not supposed to see.
2. Secondly, I will not allow anyone to take away or ridiculize emotions.
   It is a typical Western approach to 'make away' feelings, but also most other 'cultures' and especially very efficiently aggressive ones (all in their own way) on all continents today exist by breaking children by tearing their souls into pieces and turning them into objects and instruments - sometimes more the males, sometimes more the females, but altogether it breaks up what we as humans could be and are meant to be.
   Without feelings, emotions, there is also no access to 'see', and without emotional drive which is clearly distinguished from reptilish and animalistic drives, there is no way to resist what goes wrong not to talk to steer onto more fruitful ground. We have to learn about our emotions, learn to accept them to handle them and learn which place they have - and about their huge and underestimated significance. If my lines reach only one soul that finds a reconfirmation what it already has sensed underlyingly and gets strengthened, I am fine.
3. In context with that, thirdly I have seen so many little selves and souls, mainly women and children but also the more sensitive men, suffer and at a point break, give away their dreams, give away their hopes and all their wishes (the latter is good but only in a highly spiritual sense).
   Some become violators themselves (men as women) and break and make suffer others and re- and re- and re-establish the violent system.
   But many simply get sick, try to keep up a mask to not be hurt further, fall back into defense mechansism, try to struggle on, try to struggle themselves out but simply can't find ways. I would like to ask them to please not give up searching deeper what is the reason behind. A pill that's thrown in does not heal, it only takes away the painful symptoms. Go searching, be tracking, learn to process. Get hold of any information that is available - and there is.
4. It is not appropriate to cover up the psychotics in the middle of or even more, at the top of society. It is not 'normal' (despite at the very stage seems to have become the norm) to be psychotic whether narcissistic or any other, it is in reality a socially unbearable aberration despite it looks as if those traits are connected to success. Yet, I am not a judge and also don't want ever to be one. But if people realize that in their very own environment certain people try to get the most and best out of something on the cost of others and that certain persons clearly transgress and override belonging and integrity of other people: say stop. Say no.
   Don't fall for false nice faces - have in mind they have trained such a lifetime-, false smiles and false evocations and also don't fall for anything because many people state it (that's actually the trap of democracy, yet we have to find ways to identify what outcomes some statements may have) so that you think it must be true.
   Learn about how manipulation functions, and learn to distinguish - as the perfect lyar sounds exactly like someone speaking truth. It is difficult, and for this, we need a functioning emotional body to read between the lines, to read the unspoken information and to find out about the real intentions.
5. The psychosomatic health results are yet unmeasurable. I would dare to claim that the vast majority of health cases and costs in Western societies is directly related to unhealthy psychological estates people can not withdraw from. Be aware, they will rise even more and will be at a point unpayable - thanks to the tolerance towards psychotics and their violence. Imagine what we could build up with what we permanently have to spend only for re-establishing a halfway doable status instead of a really good one where people can be creative and freely exchange - money, energies, knowledge, resources.

Anyhow, single powers are small, few, little. One to survive is better than none to survive.
And many drops become a stream.


And at the end of the day, each one of us must bear his or her very own face in the mirror.


Maybe you even find what makes the difference between 'fun' and what is meant with 'joy'.
Though fun is also fun and good where it is well-placed - unless it's merely substitutional satisfaction.

Fun you can buy, as you can buy admirers, people around you, 'right', justice', 'merry-age' and even children from such. You can buy distraction any time, food, good looks, women (/men), alcohol, drugs (including what the pharmacy sells you to lessen your symptomatic pain) and you can afford to run away from the tasks life gives you, any time.


Love, life, filledness, completeness of the self, the soul and to feel real joy
even if those are hard to find and rare especially these days
no one will get on that market where money or credit card pays.

At least this is my outcome of the latest experiences: to understand the bible words why no rich will make it to the higher levels, called heavens in that oldish words. They got it just to easy to substitute and buy themselves out from solving their things and buying themselves distraction. Maslow's at it's best.

The other issue I too really 'got' insight is one that many pastors and priests talk long stories around about and still I never understood, just now. It is why no one patches a new piece of fabric on an old dress. Because, just patched, it all still remains nothing but ... an old dress.

Thanking for those, I wish you a real
En-Joy the day!

Lyn

To Start or Get Startled

Want a change? Maybe just change a few things in life - maybe a real big change? Maybe it is long time overdue, and you know it very well?

But it doesn't function?

'Something' is always pulling you back, and like 'magic', things happen in your life to  keep you exactly there where you have always been? 'Constraints' or 'events' happen that hinder you from doing things you wanted and make it easy for you to excuse because that was all beyond your influence?

Have you ever considered that you in fact don't want a change? 

That you in principle want everything to stay the same as it was and is, as you know it, despite you have learned that either that version does not work or that there indeed is something more than you would have considered before which you would like to go for - but you don't?

It is easy to say that we need a change, and many people really, really wish such to happen.

Many put all their hopes into that one day when at one point things that are simply running bad will change. They believe in a certain point in time, that a certain event occurs that might cause the change. Many want to believe it is this year 2012, and when such kind of 'predictions' which in principle are based on no fundaments, won't work out they will still go on in the same ways as before. Many believe in the Hundredth Monkey Phenomenon when we have reached an equilibrum where a paradigm change just appears out of the sudden. Some believe in that the effects we cause ourselves, as Fukushima, will make more people think and such induce the world to change. Well, Chernobyl hasn't changed anything - so why do they believe Fukushima will? Some believe in Aliens landing with spacecrafts and making that change happen. Good luck.

The species Homo Sapiens is quite resistant against any wisdom and better knowledge and even against understanding simple causalities. Humans get stirred and irritated for a while and that was most likely all. Some individuals though wake up a little from their slur. But those are really only a few. They try for a while to create awareness and soon give up, ending up in funny little splinter societies which create their very own rules and where they can keep on painting the world as they like it to be. There they find a role they like to play, and on goes the game of acting and playing around instead of living life as they are given it.

It's up to us to re-al-ize that it's only us who can make things happen. 

If we in principle want that everything stays the same, then it certainly will be exactly so. In small areas, in private or in bigger relations, not to talk about a major shift.


I would like to thank all those who take a lot on their shoulders and give up or refuse a lot amenities just to follow that little spark inside. 

Integrity has a price and it is worth to 'pay' it. When there is often enough no big light, there is at least some little tiny spark, sometimes lit by an at first sight unprominent occasion, person or event, which stirs and guides us and ignites our engines, big or small, tiny or immensely powerful when the time has come. It's up to us to note it.

Needless to mention that the aliens some people wait for are already here. Same as 'the dead' are walking just among us, and even 'Christ' whom so many 'Christians' wait for. Babylon, as well, just look at how even people who speak the same language misinterpret each other. 

Just that they are not able to see, caught in their own little illusions of how they imagine the world to be, and waiting for someone in the hierarchy to tell them what they should believe if already they can't believe their very own eyes and ears and senses.

This and many other optical illusions you'll find on
web design mash - Totally Mind-Bending Optical Illusions

It's the pictures they have gotten implanted and continuously get refreshed (and actively though unknowingly refresh themselves) that make them blind to what happens around them. And lots of people who in the same way don't want things to change and cling to you as an object - not as an alive being - will confirm that it is best to stay where you are. 'I only want what's best' can actually have two very diverging meanings. Like a conglomerate of needy molecules one sticks to the other and together they form weird synthetics, just never anything pure and of own will or identity. Just ask those and you will always live somebody else's life. Just never yours which would give you the option to freely chose and create what you really have in mind. So the question we may ask ourselves when we are unsatisfied is: 

Would we be ready to give up a few of our illusions, just some of our convenience way we have bedded our egos in so well, if we would get in real what we, our souls, our hearts, had wanted for so long? 

Are we ready to leave a lot of rubbish behind of which we anyway know it does not function, like habits (which even might not be our own ones but we 'got used to' by bending our selves to others' wills), attitudes (we have learned at an early stage and never questioned), ways to approach problems (we already have learned that they don't work)? 
Or would we stick with habits and convenient believes that never had made us happy but that we just got so accustomed to?

Well, as usual it's all up to us. We are masters. Not necessarily of the world or of the universe - but we are free to master our very own lives to a certain degree and within the framework we are placed in or are placing ouselves in. As, of course, we are part of a bigger organism or system but still we have the power to act as we like. 
Or we can re-act only, be steered by others and be slaves of a pre-set environment instead of realizing that if already we are part of a system, we also have some power within that system. Who wants to end up like the fox in the fable who re-al-igned his view by finding that the grapes he had longed for anyway were too sour? I am deeply convinced that we shouldn't let go our dreams just because of a few hinderances. Humans are creative, and their main brain skills is to invent possibilities where it didn't look as if there were any. It is even us ourselves who form our own brains ... but that's another topic.

Believe it or not: it's you who has the key in hands to start your engine - or you who is getting startled.

The latter is severely re-lated to dysautonomia.

And 'relation' has to do with 'to rely'. Do you have a relation with your self? Can you rely on your self? 

If not - who else could rely on you if already you can't do?

By the way, the ego is completely reliable, it always functions simply and plain, it flees or attacks and defends, that depends. It is completely linear, caught in duality. It's easy, one box here - and one box there. That's why so many take that instead.

It's not about that there would be anything wrong with an ego (each one of us got one ... so are the rules and the game). The ego is fine and helps us through a lot of troubles. It's simply about the balance and when to apply which of the two.

Think about it if you like so, and have a nice day,

Lyn

Finding of the Day - Manatee

Nothing more to say. I really, really love them.

Poor cute manatee. It's certainly not very funny for him or her. Looks as if they obviously have not a good sight ... but as I feel them, lots of senses otherwise. Just probably not made for dealing with the tricky inventions of man.

Just Talk to Strangers

There is nothing as fruitful as talking with total strangers, sometimes.

We humans need us humans, and as a set up organism of many, we get in deep trouble if we would try to live as one only, or if we remain in isolated areas of thinking and habits where nothing changes and nothing really ex-changes, too.

Isolated and alone is not what we were made for, despite it sometimes is very necessary to get back to our roots and re-arrange inside and all alone. Like a car needs to see the garage from time to time for a check-up whether it is still safe for the road, it is not disadvantegeous if we do similarly. That check-up of course can not be done by people who only look at the seats and if the steering wheel still look quite o.k. If the engine or the gears grumble, there are specialists needed who may look deeper and into the not immediately obvious, and not just with the expectation that anyway it was functioning until now so why should there be anything to re-adjust. With that attitude and superficiality it is quite likely that one day the vehicle might show strange habits on the road, and very unexpectedly then.

It is certainly better if either we ourselves check-up, in case we call the rare ability for self-assessing our own. Or if we get checked by and check with total strangers. In many situations in life it had been total strangers who re-arranged and widely enlarged my views. People whom I met on travels. Old people. Young people. People from a totally different background and among each others the same, people with totally different life experiences, roots and outlooks, hopes and dreams. Talks after some long and deep thinking at a bar with someone, in an otherwise lonely place, can re-set some of our views we have on life and on ourselves. On our life, on the lives of others and on life itself. A talk to an unsympathic neighbour at first sight, in a café. Talks in closed circles of similar kinds to tranches of your own kind, too, though only for a little while, as no one is like you, anyone, any little creature is created uniquely and has to find through it's life in a unique and own way. There is no one to tell us how it works but only many, many different views from which we can try to see issues from a new and different angle. We don't have to agree and nevertheless, such enriches us enourmously.

'Source Pool' by RoguePhotonic
http://www.flickr.com/photos/roguephotonic/

Thus, we come together, open up for some moments, and automatically what ever we just carry with us gets a different re-flection, even if we do not dwell so extremely much in the details. Souls on their ways traveling through the world and getting tossed around need other souls to re-cognize the shine and why we are here. Searchers and any other alive beings re-cognize, re-flect and re-spect one another. I guess that's quite similar to how P. Coelho describes it in his booklet 'Manual of The Warrior of Light'. Hopefully, they then depart with the good input and memories of the meet, and do not try to turn it into a here-level relation (as this one doesn't work. We may get to learn that we are connected, always, anyway).

What enriches us stays within and both or all involved refill their reservoirs, apart from fruitful inputs for the way further. We all lose energies while we deal with those who can't refill from life itself or from the satisfaction they create themselves. We need one another, from time to time, and it is so tremendously precious to meet others who also haven't given up searching for what is meant. People who dare to take risks in life to stand in for something they are totally convinced of, people who dare to oppose what goes wrong and who have not given up looking behind and anew and for better ways. We all have our blessures but we also all have the ability to heal them well. We don't have to stick like instable molecules fixed to other instable molecules. We meet, cherish, and let go. It took me long time to learn this.

Don't try to conserve. Cherish. Enjoy. And ... let it flow. 

It is a funny permanent contradiction that those humans who already are on their way also deal a lot with self re-adjustment, and that those who are much further whole deal a lot more with healing and getting new, different and deeper perspectives and insights.

Have an energetic and re-flected start into this another. beautiful weekend, too, and enjoy a merry meet where ever it may come along. For those who seek for growth, may it be good fruitful input to enjoy and refill for your further way.

May be you re-al-ize your self.

Cheers,
Lyn

Little Heart on Wings Today

I'll bring you more than a song .... for a song in itself is not what you have required.


The song is metaphorical ... it is up to us what we worship and how we do. It is about integrity and what we go for in this our life and what funny roads we sometimes walk when we think we do but we don't.

The swan was real, today (though I couldn't catch it myself on picture but it flew like that one above straight above our heads) and the song was running in my head by itself today.



Thanks, most tiny little ones and thanks, most great and highest. In the beginning and in the end, it all belongs together as one.

And thanks, my daughter with the name of light, thanks for so much you have been showing me since you came into my life. May yours be the wings of the swan, too, one day. They and we also belong together and will come together as one.
Lyn

Only loved when we perform?

In the difficult and ongoing pursuit of finding at least a few answers on what is love, the meaning of life, what is connection, and what it is worth going for, there are at a point automatically coming up questions, induced through incidents in life, like:

Are we only loved when we perform?

Is it that we only deserve love when we are always delivering benefits to others?

Or do we have a right for being loved also when it's us who make mistakes?

What kind of people will turn away when at a point we simply can't perform at best, when we are too weak ourselves to direct everything in good ways, when it's simply us who are the ones in need of being carried, while usually we do carry others quite well?
And what kind of people will stay with us, also at the point when we simply are standing in front of a wall, when we are not finding ways out for a moment?
Who will stay with us when we have been staying with them, standing by their side always, at the point we are weak? Who will it be who carries us through that time when we have exhausted our energies and need a time to rest? And who will be strong enough just to endure also a little hardnesses for just a while until we have recovered, who will be looking into our eyes to realize how we are?

Who will softly caress our souls then when we are in need?

And who will just turn and run away, not caring what he leaves behind and how you are and feel while he or she was taking freely when you stayed there to support him or her when he/she was in need?

These are good questions to ask ourselves at certain stages in life.
The answers, deeply coming from the utmost innerst, will re-direct our path.

Love is light and light is love, though I dislike the esoteric taking over these terms, but so it is. Receiving a little love, a little light, when at a point all around looks like dark and we seem to not being able to make it, is as essential as providing such when others are in need.

It is fire who gives life to ice (said Waftrudnir).
And it is love which sees light and which will always go searching a light at the end of a tunnel and will overcome any constraints. It is us who need to allow. It is our will, our free decision.

The love someone is able to give us when we need, not only when we perform, is the most precious of all.

The 'love' and support that is given only as a reward for 'performing' or for benefits we constantly deliver, not from out of itself because it deeply wants to give itself, is nothing but a dangerous illusion.

Most often and unfortunately, it takes time and special occasions to find out what is this and what is that.

Sending a little love for those who also ask themselves such questions. And my answer is: Despite we are here to certainly have done our best from our side, we can not always be strong. We have the right, a natural right, to also at a point be weak and to wish there was someone taking over at that moment. Most often, this will not happen. But then we know who is. And who is not. For you, and me, a beautiful song performed by The Corrs.



Love,
Lyn