It is often said and quoted that people who have experienced something (whatever), will in their own future life just repeat the same, only with changed roles. This is said to count for many abusers as the reason might be, even unknowingly, that they themselves hade been abused at a point. I have seen that many times in life. What we experience and learn in early childhood remains. In our brains, as action patterns.
Our world is a world where any being anyway is to a good part the product of its environment.
If this is the assumption then the consequence will be that anything and everything repeats. Until it is relieved, somehow. If not, patterns repeat being passed on from generation to generation, in single beings as well as collectively.
Have you ever thought about the other option which we have is to distance ourselves from the not so good things that happened in our lives, even when we were very little and we do not consciously remember? We often blindly repeat what is in our programming until maybe, at a point, after having repeated nonsense over long, long time, we might be able to reflect our own doing and get into distance to it.
Or we run around and have no proper program for ourselves at all in case we neglect this predestination early but nevertheless, we ourselves have to find an own way. The latter might be accompanied by stumbling over many pitfalls and into many traps in quite a harsh learning process.
And then ....
... we have the option to invent.
To create things as we vision them to be good.
When we do the principal job of sorting out - for ourselves.
If we had a childhood which was dominated by lack of love, food, whatever, and even if we have not become conscious about it, yet, but we always run for something, always try to find something we have no clue what it is - what hinders us to
The difficulty mainly is that people who have experienced hard treatment, lack of material needs or lack of love, often fall back into becoming the then active part if another one is in need of such. They keep on playing a role game for all their lifetimes, and keep on looking for 'victims' as they once had been 'victims' themselves. To get into an illusion of now not being the victim, they need others to be such. They continue a bad game that has been played on them, not reflecting what that game had felt like for themselves at a point. They never get into that state of transforming and creating by themselves. They themselves such always remain victims, even if for them it now looks the other way around.
The opposite, and same desastrous, is stuffing too much of what we have lacked ourselves into others, into children, for instance, without regarding the present circumstances thoroughly. It actually must be taken into account that the measure makes the medicine. Also are we then not free from the results of the lack at all. We just do the opposite which is the same a kind of dependency and a kind of revolting behaviour, similar the behaviour of pubiciting kids when the abandon all that the parents say or do and can not differentiate the good and bad, the useful and the unusable at all. They are just against, and that is still ... dependency. This style has nothing to do with being free at all.
Sometimes though, it is necessary to oppose and rebell, indeed. That is when something does not want to let us go. Then we must with all our efforts pull away from it, or fence off. Clearly. Just later in the process, we may come to milder conclusions and actions. When something needs to be removed for complete clearance, it does not help and does no good to keep ourselves clinging to it.
We need to untie, completely, to reconstruct a new and free relation.
We may always pick out the patterns of good from literally every where, to create what is our vision of good. What is our vision of life. Because otherwise, anyway, it will never happen.
There is lots of good around. Well, maybe not so much, but there is. The difficulty is just to see and find it.
No taboos about what we might be allowed to think or question.
We may question all, and we may think all and everything, too.
And then we can build new houses. Such that really fit. Such that are good for us and every one around us.
Little or big - they all then are just beautiful. The only thing these willl lack then, are skeletons in the closets.
Fine regards,
Lyn.
Our world is a world where any being anyway is to a good part the product of its environment.
If this is the assumption then the consequence will be that anything and everything repeats. Until it is relieved, somehow. If not, patterns repeat being passed on from generation to generation, in single beings as well as collectively.
Have you ever thought about the other option which we have is to distance ourselves from the not so good things that happened in our lives, even when we were very little and we do not consciously remember? We often blindly repeat what is in our programming until maybe, at a point, after having repeated nonsense over long, long time, we might be able to reflect our own doing and get into distance to it.
Or we run around and have no proper program for ourselves at all in case we neglect this predestination early but nevertheless, we ourselves have to find an own way. The latter might be accompanied by stumbling over many pitfalls and into many traps in quite a harsh learning process.
And then ....
... we have the option to invent.
To create things as we vision them to be good.
When we do the principal job of sorting out - for ourselves.
If we had a childhood which was dominated by lack of love, food, whatever, and even if we have not become conscious about it, yet, but we always run for something, always try to find something we have no clue what it is - what hinders us to
- allow ourselves from now on to be worthy of having what we lacked
- allow others to be worthy of the same?
The difficulty mainly is that people who have experienced hard treatment, lack of material needs or lack of love, often fall back into becoming the then active part if another one is in need of such. They keep on playing a role game for all their lifetimes, and keep on looking for 'victims' as they once had been 'victims' themselves. To get into an illusion of now not being the victim, they need others to be such. They continue a bad game that has been played on them, not reflecting what that game had felt like for themselves at a point. They never get into that state of transforming and creating by themselves. They themselves such always remain victims, even if for them it now looks the other way around. The opposite, and same desastrous, is stuffing too much of what we have lacked ourselves into others, into children, for instance, without regarding the present circumstances thoroughly. It actually must be taken into account that the measure makes the medicine. Also are we then not free from the results of the lack at all. We just do the opposite which is the same a kind of dependency and a kind of revolting behaviour, similar the behaviour of pubiciting kids when the abandon all that the parents say or do and can not differentiate the good and bad, the useful and the unusable at all. They are just against, and that is still ... dependency. This style has nothing to do with being free at all.
Sometimes though, it is necessary to oppose and rebell, indeed. That is when something does not want to let us go. Then we must with all our efforts pull away from it, or fence off. Clearly. Just later in the process, we may come to milder conclusions and actions. When something needs to be removed for complete clearance, it does not help and does no good to keep ourselves clinging to it.
We need to untie, completely, to reconstruct a new and free relation.
We may always pick out the patterns of good from literally every where, to create what is our vision of good. What is our vision of life. Because otherwise, anyway, it will never happen.
There is lots of good around. Well, maybe not so much, but there is. The difficulty is just to see and find it.
No taboos about what we might be allowed to think or question.
We may question all, and we may think all and everything, too.
And then we can build new houses. Such that really fit. Such that are good for us and every one around us.
Little or big - they all then are just beautiful. The only thing these willl lack then, are skeletons in the closets.
Fine regards,
Lyn.
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